My darling sister,
Sorry its been awhile since I posted. Its been crazy this past week, emotionally, physically , financially the whole nine yards.
Augh I cant wait until things settle down with our finances. You know that life doesn't revolve around money, but it can set a tone in our lives. It can really strain our marriage alot. We always work through it, thankfully with God on our side, but we always hit bumps. Always. I almost feel like a fool for complaining, because God has done nothing but bless us since Chris got out of the army. Without God, we would be without a house, among other things, but it never fails, the beginning of every month somehow God has moved and helped us paid our rent. The other bills have always been up to me, but we have managed, barely...I guess sometimes that's all that matters.
Even though Gods taken care of us, I still cant wait until this part of our life is over though. It really is hard to live like this. Maybe its because we were so comfortable when he was in the army, living right within our means but then when he got our means went down the drain. Its hard to get a job for $18/$19 dollars (roughly what we made when he was in) an hour when you have no degree. And than of course he had to get used to working in a whole nother environment, which had its own challenges. But he did his best, and that's all we could ask for. We managed to get through that section, him working at Clowns, and me working with you at the Bean. :) And now we are just waiting for the money from the schooling to come in. Once it kicks in, I'm hoping and praying that we will finally be ok in that area. But I'm almost afraid to hope, because it just seems like everytime I hope things get better, or when I know they re suppose to they just dont. For example I knew we would be perfectly fine with paying for Chris's schooling and for his tools because he was suppose to get a check for the grants the government was giving us. Well when the day finally came we barely got half of what we were suppose to get because the VA hadn't kicked in. Long story short, we will get reimbursed, just not until Jan. 9 2012. And maybe God has a plan, maybe the tithes? I don't know.
I'm sitting here 8am in the morning haha. The only time I have been up this early is when I get off my graveyard shifts. Oh how i hate those haha. But its ok, hopefully when April comes around I will be able to stop graveyard shift. I fed Ariella this morning, she has been nothings but giggles and goos all morning, and that makes my world s much more brighter, didnt realize how much I missed her this week, all i have been doing literally is sleeping and working.
I was sitting here clipping coupons, with new episodes of Army Wives on. Finally they put the new seasons of it on netflix. I started watching the show when Chris was deployed to Iraq. He never understood why I watched it. He always asked 'Why i would put myself through it'. It is a very emotional show. When I found out there were new episodes last week I started watching it. One day Chis came home from school to find Ari and I cuddled on the couch watching one and he just shook his head and asked the same old question. Why?
And here I was this morning, just sitting here, with Ari in her fancy swing, and me clipping coupons watching the show. I realize that I still watch the show, even though it makes me cry alot (cuz its pretty realistic), I still watch the show to remind myself how good I have it right now. Mu husband is home with my daughter and me. He is not away in Iraq or Afghanistan fighting a war anymore. I don't spend my nights holding his pillow, devastated because after 8months his scent has finally left everything in the house, like he never existed. I dont jump at every phone call, hoping and praying its him on one hand, but on the other almost dreading it is, because that means once again I would have had to say good bye. That year was one of the worst years of my life. One of the hardest. I'm glad its over. And even though life is really sucking sometimes right now, and Ive had to battle with hating life alot this week, I'm thankful and grateful, and i know that I really do have it good. I have all my family here with me.
You, mom and dad really helped me through that year. Without you guys I am nost sure I would have made it through as sane as I did. And now your leaving. An that's just a whole nother rollecoster ride Im not even going to go into right now since this post is so long already. But I keep reminding myself, at least its driving distance :P its still going to suck, and I'm going to miss you so much, but at least your not going away to far. :) And theres always skype, so you can see the baby, and so I can see you. :)
Alright well Im going to put some cute pics of the princess up, and than call it good. I will try and keep up with the posts so they dont have to be sooo long. haha. I love you Monique. Oh and the dresses are beautiful. Im sorry if I seemed a little off when you showed me and when I tried them on.. I just found out some things about my bank account so I was upset. And than with every piece you buy, every invitation you make, it just become more of a reality that your all grown up now, and ready to get married and have a family of your own. And Im so proud of you.
I love you alot.
Sorry its been awhile since I posted. Its been crazy this past week, emotionally, physically , financially the whole nine yards.
Augh I cant wait until things settle down with our finances. You know that life doesn't revolve around money, but it can set a tone in our lives. It can really strain our marriage alot. We always work through it, thankfully with God on our side, but we always hit bumps. Always. I almost feel like a fool for complaining, because God has done nothing but bless us since Chris got out of the army. Without God, we would be without a house, among other things, but it never fails, the beginning of every month somehow God has moved and helped us paid our rent. The other bills have always been up to me, but we have managed, barely...I guess sometimes that's all that matters.
Even though Gods taken care of us, I still cant wait until this part of our life is over though. It really is hard to live like this. Maybe its because we were so comfortable when he was in the army, living right within our means but then when he got our means went down the drain. Its hard to get a job for $18/$19 dollars (roughly what we made when he was in) an hour when you have no degree. And than of course he had to get used to working in a whole nother environment, which had its own challenges. But he did his best, and that's all we could ask for. We managed to get through that section, him working at Clowns, and me working with you at the Bean. :) And now we are just waiting for the money from the schooling to come in. Once it kicks in, I'm hoping and praying that we will finally be ok in that area. But I'm almost afraid to hope, because it just seems like everytime I hope things get better, or when I know they re suppose to they just dont. For example I knew we would be perfectly fine with paying for Chris's schooling and for his tools because he was suppose to get a check for the grants the government was giving us. Well when the day finally came we barely got half of what we were suppose to get because the VA hadn't kicked in. Long story short, we will get reimbursed, just not until Jan. 9 2012. And maybe God has a plan, maybe the tithes? I don't know.
I'm sitting here 8am in the morning haha. The only time I have been up this early is when I get off my graveyard shifts. Oh how i hate those haha. But its ok, hopefully when April comes around I will be able to stop graveyard shift. I fed Ariella this morning, she has been nothings but giggles and goos all morning, and that makes my world s much more brighter, didnt realize how much I missed her this week, all i have been doing literally is sleeping and working.
I was sitting here clipping coupons, with new episodes of Army Wives on. Finally they put the new seasons of it on netflix. I started watching the show when Chris was deployed to Iraq. He never understood why I watched it. He always asked 'Why i would put myself through it'. It is a very emotional show. When I found out there were new episodes last week I started watching it. One day Chis came home from school to find Ari and I cuddled on the couch watching one and he just shook his head and asked the same old question. Why?
And here I was this morning, just sitting here, with Ari in her fancy swing, and me clipping coupons watching the show. I realize that I still watch the show, even though it makes me cry alot (cuz its pretty realistic), I still watch the show to remind myself how good I have it right now. Mu husband is home with my daughter and me. He is not away in Iraq or Afghanistan fighting a war anymore. I don't spend my nights holding his pillow, devastated because after 8months his scent has finally left everything in the house, like he never existed. I dont jump at every phone call, hoping and praying its him on one hand, but on the other almost dreading it is, because that means once again I would have had to say good bye. That year was one of the worst years of my life. One of the hardest. I'm glad its over. And even though life is really sucking sometimes right now, and Ive had to battle with hating life alot this week, I'm thankful and grateful, and i know that I really do have it good. I have all my family here with me.
You, mom and dad really helped me through that year. Without you guys I am nost sure I would have made it through as sane as I did. And now your leaving. An that's just a whole nother rollecoster ride Im not even going to go into right now since this post is so long already. But I keep reminding myself, at least its driving distance :P its still going to suck, and I'm going to miss you so much, but at least your not going away to far. :) And theres always skype, so you can see the baby, and so I can see you. :)
Alright well Im going to put some cute pics of the princess up, and than call it good. I will try and keep up with the posts so they dont have to be sooo long. haha. I love you Monique. Oh and the dresses are beautiful. Im sorry if I seemed a little off when you showed me and when I tried them on.. I just found out some things about my bank account so I was upset. And than with every piece you buy, every invitation you make, it just become more of a reality that your all grown up now, and ready to get married and have a family of your own. And Im so proud of you.
I love you alot.
1 comment:
Yeah. I cried.
Love you.
Keep posting.
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